My post baby body

I have seen so many women showing and embracing their post pregnancy body.  Showing love for their new self.  And it is fantastic!  And I admire them so much.

These strong women fill my newsfeed with their positive messages and encouragement to redefine what post partum bodies look like in an environment so saturated by images of celebrities getting back to "normal" as quickly as possible.

All this positivity makes me feel a little... well... different than other women.  Maybe a little left out?

The truth is that I don't feel positive about my post baby body. I have a sense of humor about it, yes, but positive is not how I would describe my feelings on the whole *ahem* situation.

The truth is I don't like what pregnancy does to my body.  I do not feel physically great during or in the year following pregnancy.  (I won't digress and tell you about the during pregnancy fun stuff)  

Perhaps it is hormonal, but my body seems to lose an initial amount of weight and then it stops.  And it will continue to sit at that weight for about a year until breastfeeding slows.

Before you go suggesting it... tried dieting with both... it's a waste of time during that first year.  Exercise helps firm things up and that goes a long way, but really no overall weight loss.

After about a year, I am able to get back closer to normal, but realistically my body will never be the same...

You might be from the Northwest if your favorite breastfeeding cover is a plaid flannel shirt.

I have breastfed two children and may at some point breastfeed more.  Let's say things aren't quite as perky.

I have gained and lost a good amount of weight.  I don't gain and lose the "recommended" 25 pounds.  My body prefers 42 pounds and has stuck to that number both times, despite remaining active and eating well, especially the second time in an attempt to gain less weight.

Overdue with Charlie and feeling it.  I made my husband take
3 pictures in order to get one where I felt remotely presentable.

I can't be the only woman out there that feels this way, right?

I can't be the only women who wakes up after a few months post baby and thinks ugh, I really wish my favorite jeans fit and my fave black leather jacket zipped around my boobs.

I can't be the only one who looks longingly at their favorite pre-baby comfy bra and says someday you and I will be together again.

Fortunately my feet didn't grow, so my shoes and I can still be besties.  Thank God!!  My husband would have a basket case on his hands if I had to part with my favorite boots.

But here is what I can say about my post baby body - I GREW two humans dammit.  So even if my body felt miserable a good portion of the time during pregnancy and even if I feel crappy for a whole year following, I get seriously beautiful babies.

And that's the reason, I don't sweat the situation with my body.  That's why I can laugh and tell the truth about it. Loving or not loving my body is small potatoes compared to the enormity of creating life.  That part makes me feel like kind of like a badass superhero.

Selfie with Charlie!

And I wouldn't trade my little rascals for all the stretch marks and the extra 17 pounds that has decided to stick around for a year after I have them (seriously... 17 lbs on the nose both times.  So annoying).

Gilbert at just a few days old.  Where did the time go?

So, I'm not towing the party line on loving my post baby body.  I'm going to love what my body gave me (my beautiful, magical, delicious babies) and sit tight on all the body love.

Who knows?  Maybe in a year or two I will feel differently and post some sweet post partum photos on the blog.  (Unlikely though.  I'm not really a body picture type of gal)

Favorite jeans and beautiful custom leather jacket from Argentina... I have tucked you in the back of closet, but I'm not losing hope that we will meet again in about another 9 - 10 months.   Auf Wiedersehen.

Watermelon Keg!

As part of expanding our library of useful reading material, we added a book on modern pioneering

It is a great resource with lots of interesting and practical ideas.

Naturally, the first thing we chose to do was something that has nothing to do with self sufficiency and everything to do with just good old fun.

We made a watermelon keg.  It was so easy and when filled with a tasty watermelon cocktail, it was a hit!

How to make a Watermelon Keg

You will need:

Large watermelon
A large spoon / knife for carving
A spigot - I prefer a plastic, threaded one like you can buy here.

Slice a thin layer off the bottom to allow the watermelon to stand on end.  Keep your cut well within the rind, so that it doesn't leak.

Then take a large slice off the top to create the "lid".  I recommend scoring around the part where you want to cut the lid while the watermelon is standing.  This helps you make a level lid, so that it won't slide off.

Thin slice for the base and then it will stand on its own!

And now, get to scooping.

My homestud at work <3

Scoop and scoop and scoop out all those insides (and don't forget to munch on some watermelon slices while you are at it).

This is the step where Gilbert excels....

Once it is cleaned out, it is time to cut the hole for the spigot on the lower portion of the keg.  Tip: start the hole small and gradually trim it to size.  If you cut it too large, you are out of luck.

My husband let me film him cutting the hole in our second keg.  (Okay I recorded it and told him I was filming after the fact so as not to make him nervous). As you can see in the video, it really is quick and simple.

Video not loading?  View it here instead

Screw in the spigot.  If it is not coming through the inside, scoop out more of the innards until it is exposed.

Then fill with the liquid of your choice.

Presto!  Watermelon keg!

I highly recommend tossing some watermelon (about half a blender's worth) and a handful off chocolate mint leaves in a blender.

Add vodka to taste and blend until smooth.

Now add a bit more vodka (because you pour over ice and it waters down a bit).  Personally I found it tastes about right when you start with a blender half full of watermelon and mint then fill 3/4 full with the vodka.

Then pour over ice and party!

Soooooo freshing!

The urgency of being 3

I started out to write a post about how to preserve cherry tomatoes, but then as I was typing my 3 year old walked up, rubbed my back, and asked if I was thirsty.  I said yes and he went and got me some water.

All the sudden I didn't want to post about tomatoes anymore.  I want to tell you all about my first born. My Gilbert.

In all the challenging moments of motherhood (for example my three month old spit up in my mouth last week), I latch on to the moments like the glass of water when I see a little kind person shining through all that toddler.

Gilbert is 3 years old and full of vibrant life.  He consumes knowledge voraciously.  Every piece of information is urgent for him to learn and then urgent for him to share (mostly with Charlie).

He catapults out of his room at night (after we think he's asleep) just to ask "what is this?  What does this say?  I can't read.  I need to know this!"  Finding out the piece of information CANNOT wait until the morning.  I have resigned myself to answering his questions and sending him back to bed.

He takes planting lima beans very seriously.

And sometimes he runs up to me and yells "I love you.  I just needed to tell you".

He needed to tell me.  NEED.  (Seriously... sometimes I wish adults were more like children.  How many times have you called somebody up or run up to a person just to tell them you loved them?  Because you NEEDED to tell them.  It was urgent.   It could not wait).

Gilbert has been enamored with Charlie since day 1. 

That's my favorite thing about him: he's expressive and kind.  He notices how others are feeling and his instinct is to help.  He is very gentle with animals.  Every day, at least twice, he asks me how I'm doing and then sits to wait for a real response.  When I reciprocate, he beams and launches into quite the stream of consciousness account of how he is doing.



Don't get me wrong, he's definitely 3.  He'll karate chop you and challenge you to a wizards' duel too.  He will sit down and tell you all about the dragons he has memorized.  Because you need to know about the "screaming death" or the "hideous zippleback."  It's essential knowledge in his (stubborn) opinion.

Tractors are the coolest machines in the world to him.

Just tonight, he ran out of his room and said he needed to talk to me.  Immediately.

The subject? Dinosaur Extinction. He needed a commitment that tomorrow we figure out how all the dinosaurs died.

So tomorrow's schedule in between snack time and lunch reads "find out how dinosaurs died."  Because for Gilbert this is of the utmost importance.  It cannot wait a week.  It's a miracle it waited until morning.

And that's my impatient, energetic, sweet Gilbert.